THE PRINCESS AND HER PRINCE

Once upon a time, there was a beautiful princess (Me) who waited hand and foot on her charming little prince (Mason).  The prince often played video games, while the princess cooked dinner, did laundry and cleaned the house.  On this particular night, the routine was as always.   The princess placed the prince in a chair, with a DS in hand, so she could retreat to the dungeon to get her laundry.  At the Princess' first attempt out to the dungeon,  the prince decided to place the pizza into the hot oven by himself.  The task was accomplished, but the Princess was mad at the prince and told him of the dangers with an oven.  He shrugged her off...  after all....  Princess' are stupid (YES I was called stupid tonight)!!!!  So, with the threat of death to her young prince, the princess retreated to the dungeon for the second time.   The princess had to run through the rain to the dungeon and dreamingly longed for the totinos pizza that she would be able to endulge in once she had completed her dreaded laundry.  Upon re-entering the castle, the princess suddenly smelled something not of the ordinary...  Not really smokey...   Not really burning...  but definitely something not right.   So, with her wet slippers on she proceeded into the tiled dining area...  the smell became stronger and she worried at what it might be...   In no time at all, she was sliding and slipping ever so gracefully on the tile floor.  This way and that way, over and under...  but don't worry, the princess was strong and caught herself before she damaged any part of her body arts.  WHAT THE HECK?   WHY IS THE FLOOR SO SLICK?  I WAS ONLY GONE FOR TWO MINUTES!!!  As the princess looked towards the innocent looking prince, she knew he had been up to no good.... and then she noticed a can.... a spray type can... and immediately knew where the smell had come from.  Do any of you know what happens when you spray buttery cooking spray all over the dining room tile and the princess steps onto it with wet shoes? 

Well here is what happened....    The young spoiled prince learned how to mop the entire floor on his hands and knees!!!!!

I would like to say that it ended there...  but that would not be fun!!!!!

While the prince was on his hands and knees....  the princess was trying to tame her temper....   she knew that if she were to  spank the clever little lad, that the towns people would look down on her...  So she patiently  (ok, not patiently....   more like forcefully)  prodded the prince to tell her why he had done such a ridiculous trick.

The prince did not answer the question, rather he asked the princess if she was mad.  The princess replied with "Of course I am Mad".....   and the prince came back with "Geez you are grouchy"!!!!

and they DID NOT live happily ever after!!!!!    THE END

Funnies :)

DOG NAMES
Laying in bed one night, Mason was telling me a story...  It started out beautifully with "Once upon a time"...   Then took a drastic change with him talking about vampires and coyotes...  (his stories are definitely entertaining, but rarely make sense)
Mason:  "Suddenly the mean coyotes turned into nice dogs.. two dogs!   They were my dogs.  Do you like my dogs mom? they are pretty"

Mom:   "What are your dogs names Mason?"

Mason:   "Hmmmmmmm.......   I think I will name them Twizzle and Syllable" 


EASTER BASKET
Mason was pulling out all of his candy and was super excited.  Then he found his PeePs!!!

Mason: Oh my goodness....   look I got Poops!!

OLD MAN
Mason and I went to the Dollar General the other day..  One of our favorite stores in town (and it's not because it's only one of three :) and as we pull into a parking spot  I hear...
Mason:  What happened to him? 
Mom:  What happened to who?   and just as I finish that sentence I look inside the vehicle next to us and notice a not so well kept man with a full beard and about one tooth.   But before and I can stop Mason, he is out of the car and standing next to his truck waiting for his door to open...   and just as it did....
Mason:  What happened to you?
Guy:  OH... I don't know
Mason:  Why you got whiskers?
Guy:  I just do
At this point I am trying to grab Mason's hand and hurry into the store so he will stop asking questions.
Mason:  YOU'RE OLD (Yelling as I'm dragging him)
Guy:  You're right I am.
Mason:  You're old like a grandpa.  You're really really old
Mom whispering:  shut up mason...  shut up
Mason:  We don't say shut up Mom
Now I just look stupid.... We are to the store doors now, but Mason is refusing to be drug any further...  He wants to talk with this man!!!!!
Mason:  What's in your mouth?   (Remember he is only sportin one tooth)
Mom whispering...  c'mon mason.....  let's go get a balloon, would you like some candy?, or a new car?  (please kid, stop while we are still alive!!  Can't you see that this man may kill us?)
Guy:  Well, there's not a whole lot in my mouth.
Mason:  Blllleeeeeeekkkkkkkk........... ewwwww that's gross!!!!
At this point, I grab some snot filled tissues from my purse and ever soooooooooo gently shove them into his mouth.....   I wouldn't want him to say anything that might embarrass me :)