VALENTINE'S FUN!!!

I really hope I can do this story justice.... 

Growing up, my family had a yearly tradition on Valentine's Day.  My mother would think ahead of schedule, help us bake and frost heart shaped cookies (from a cookie cutter that was shaped like a heart from the bottom of the  tomato juice can...  she is so clever)  and then drive us around to deliver them.  Such a cute idea...  to show our friends and family how much we love them.  We would lay the freshly made cookies at the base of the door, knock on the door, and run and  hide.  It was so fun for us to watch the person answer the door..  and stand there wondering who had left such delectable treats!  My mother would wait in a parked car and have another plate of cookies ready for the next house when we returned.  Well, I will never be my mother...  Not even if I put forth any effort!!!!!  I will never live up to the woman who will have surgery in the morning and show up for work in the afternoon....  She is an amazing woman!!!

Here's how my Valentine's Day rolls....   Get to work and realize "OH crap..  today is Valentine's Day"!  After school, I run to the grocery store and pay a small fortune for some pink frosted cookies, that probably nobody will ever eat, because they are store bought, not freshly baked.  Oh well, its the thought that counts.  So, once I get home and have collected Mason and wrestled the two dozen cookies out of his hands...  I begin the bagging process.  I have no paper plates so I just use some valentine's cellophane bags.  I unlike my mother, don't even have cute little cards to attach.  I'm a little more classy.. I use a sharpie to write on the bags :)  Then I staple the top of the bag  and we are ready to deliver our gifts.... 


So, we get in the car and I realize that now I have to explain to Mason how this delivering of the cookies will take place.  He won't want me to go with him, because he is now to the point where he has to do everything ALONE..  He tells me "GET OUT OF HERE MOM... I DO IT MYSELF"!!  Ok, so how do I explain the events?  LIGHT BULB... I got it..  I will tell him in "STEPS"!

Mom:  Mason I need you to pay attention  (His head is turned but I hope he is listening)

Step 1:  Put the cookies on the ground in front of the door

Step 2:  Ring the doorbell

Step 3:  Run around the side of the house and hide

Step 4:  Wait for me to honk the horn..  then run back to the car

His head is still turned

Mom: (loudly)  MASON ARE YOU LISTENING TO ME?

Mason:  (spoken very fast...) step 1 cookies on the ground...step  2  ring the doorbell... step 3 run and hide.... step 4 mom will honk.

HOLY COW..... He listened to me for the first time in his life...   It's a freakin miracle :)  At this point I am very proud of myself... feeling like I am definitely getting mother of the year award this year...  I'm a genius... A one of a kind...   a role model...   a beacon of light....  (and then mason took me out of my dream land)

Mason:  MOM LET'S GO!!!!

First house...  I pull up and park behind a truck and immediately repeat the steps.  Mason reminds me that I must stay in the car and that he can do it alone.  Then he joyfully jumps from the car... store bought cookies in hand... and bolts for the house.  He places the cookies at the base of the door... but then he starts looking around like he's lost something and I'm thinking...  c'mon ring the darn doorbell and run... why doesn't this kid ever follow directions!!  Mason is now peeking through the windows at the side of the door and his ADD is very apparent as he bobs and weaves.  Up, down and around...   And then finally I see him knock on the door... fly down the steps...  dash to the side of the house and hide!!!  He did it..   YIPPEEEE!!!  After the cookies have been taken inside, I back my car up and give a little honk, to finish off with step 4....  and Mason sneakily headed for the car :)

Mom:  Mason you did a good job!

Mason turns to me and in a very disgusted tone he says......

BUT...Mom Step 2... NO DOORBELL!!

BREAD!!!

Last Sunday, Mason and I actually made it to church on time...   I know that doesn't seem possible, but it's true we are guilty!!  We attend church in a very small building, so there isn't a lot of room.  I like to find a seat in the back on the chapel, so that we don't become some freak side show :)  At least in the back, we don't draw that much attention to ourselves and the older ward member sit in the back with us, so they really can't hear when Mason is talking :)  So, we get there early, but all the back seats are taken...  Son of a Gun!!!!!   After many minutes of Mason telling me that he wanted to sit alone, he spotted an open seat and bolted for it.   Worried that he would run straight to the pulpit and attack the microphone...  I quickly ensued!!  Scene #1 CHECK (only minutes into the meeting)  I grabbed his arm as I caught up to him and swung him sideways as if he were in a turnstyle...   and we both gracefully landed into a seat. Scene #2 CHECK   Of course it wasn't in the back or out of sight..   We were directly in the center of the action.  Then panic set in.  What if he's too loud?  What if he sneezes and snot goes everywhere? (which did happen later in the meeting, but I was prepared!  YEAH mom!)  What if he not so quietly says something inappropriately and the whole ward can hear?  thoughts then turned to... I can do this... I can do this....  The next few minutes went well...   until it was time to be quiet (Sacrament time)! 
(Remember that it is completely silent..  no crying babies..  no coughing grandmas...  SILENCE!!!)

Mason:  (Loudly)  Where's the bread? Scene #3 CHECK

Mom:  (whispering)  It's coming.

Mason:  (Loudly) Do you like bread? Scene #4 CHECK

Mom: (whispering)  Yes I do..  please be quiet Mason!

Then there was about a minute pause in the conversation.....

Mason: (Loudly)  Do you like Pumpkin bread? Scene #5 CHECK

K... I will admit..  I LOVE Pumpkin bread...  But Mason has never had any pumpkin bread..  I have never made it... So where the heck did that come from?

At this point, the folks around us are trying not to laugh... 

The rest of the meeting didn't go much better..  We made plenty of SCENES...  But we were there...  Isn't that all that counts?  :)